Simple Saturday Reflection

I've finally manage to put myself together in front of my computer on a calm Saturday morning after my personal struggle to get off bed. [Backtrack]"The fan is spinning too fast" I thought to myself as I lay lazily on the bed with one eye opened. Unmotivated, I returned to sleep to do myself justice over the weekday's hard work at the office. I deserve this sleep, Yes I do.

Hours passed.

I know I'd better wake up or I'm going to get a neck cramp. As usual, I log on to my work email; No New Mails. I know that emails will mean more work to do, but I was disappointed. I wanted more emails to read. I have an urge to read. Its literally craving for literature, I would just eat those books!.

Left the room.

Found curry laksa on the dining table; Pre-packed, Cold.. Unwanted. Aww, I picked it up and chuck it carefully on a bowl and thank god! for microwaves. Today's 'TheStar' newspaper is thick I thought, Yay!. I begin to shuffle it through to segregate every section. Its a habit of mine to organize the newspaper into sections, followed by the order of which I would love to read first. Once I'm done, I'll just chuck them away.. One by One.

Flips.... and Flips.... and Flips......

What can I expect? All on politics, how much the current government has worked for us, all their care to maintain unity, peace, freedom and justice. They fight for equality and at the same time special privileges for the 'Bumiputra' status to get discounts in major purchases. Its sort of a way to imply that they are naturally retarded compared to other race, they need the handicap one hundred miles head start. Let's not even get started on the details of their privileges.

The Classifieds on Jobs is thick and I thought they are probably more Sales position than anything else. I decided to skip that one, besides I think I'm quite happy right now where I am in my career. Surely, it needs a boost and I trust our Great Lord Jesus Christ has a great plan for me. Besides, my company, PECO just underwent a merger with Facet International and we will be known as Peco-Facet Asia soon. Once the board of directors give CEO Chris Conway the green light. Oh oh please print goodies and merchandises with the new Logo.

Promised to meet Jo at 2!. Look at the time.

Fin.

R.

The Kumar Drama

I got a close friend named Kumar,
He seems to get trapped in Karma,
Get cheated and stabbed just like in the TV Drama,
By a girl that has a heart of a frikken Llama.

He writes good rhymes,
Especially after he drinks Vodka Lime,
Just getting better from time to time,
A few more drinks and he'll be fine.

Fin.

R.

Fry the Fruss, Laugh of Life

I haven't written for years it seem.
Since I'm working in an engineering team,
My company deals with oil and gas,
Everyday the car fuel rises so damn fast,

I don't get no subsidy for gas,
Living in this world that relies so heavily on that,
Binge eating has got me fat,
My sexy body now turned out quite so sad.

Running every day now on the threadmill,
All the sweats flowing down the 'hill'
My nike shoe says just do it.
But I know I just can't feel my feet.


The Resurrection of Quill of Inspirations. 4th Scroll.
Let the chronicles begin!.

My friend kumar started blogging, I got inspired. So, here I am.

Frying and Laughing Time.

Fin.

Patience

Rejoicing in hope,
Patient in tribulation,
Continuing steadfastly
in prayer.
________________Romans 12:12____________________

It is the key to test of time,
It is the key to knowing for sure;
The measure of love,
The very thing that drives me crazy,

There have been many test on my patience today.

I was in a meeting, the meeting could had been short and straight forward. It could have been a million things except being 2 hrs long and full of shiet nothing but listening to rubbish coming from the factory manager talking about flushing toilets, scrap metals, compressors, and god knows what. I listened to those, with the most patronizing manner i can afford.

Boss trying to 'firefight' as he doesnt plan for his work!. Have a sense of urgency and if neccessary share the urgency with me earlier if you want it really soon, with enough notice, i will make things fly. Instead, he had to call me 3 hrs before deadline to tell me its actually urgent and he needs results asap. Go Frikken Die. -period-

I face tonnes of idiotic drivers in kuala lumpur everyday. Today was extra special. Its a monday. Its the day that some idiot had to breakdown and cause the entire Mrr2 to jam up. Hence, causing more idiots to spring up and drive as real assholes doing fast and furious stunts. Cutting queues. Reckless honing. Blocking roads. Not moving with a huge gap in front. Unbelievably slow driving. Geez, the items just won't end. Blahz

Above all, I had to fight my heart to stay inside my body. It wants to jump out of my body and race to where it belongs. I need to stay alive, i need it to do its job of pumping blood to my body. I need it to stay just where it is; wherever that is. It was the true test of patience.

Enough.
Time to look into what happened today and look for signs of hope and
Time to pray before i sleep
Time.
Test of time.
Patience.
Am i patient?
Enough?

Generosity

He who has a generous eye will be blessed,
For he gives of his bread to the poor.

Proverbs 22:9

______________________________________________

Quite the ordinary evening, my boss requested for my presence. Shahril called me and inform in the most urgent mannered tone that boss is looking for me. From the purchasing unit, carrying 2 huge rolls of vinyl samples, i rushed to view inside of the greeting room; my boss sitting patiently staring into space.

Have a seat
Thanks
Oh you ran here?
Yeah, no sweat sir.
Was getting these from purchasing.
Ah right, so first of all, as you know the company is giving bonus but you and shahril are still under probation, so on behalf of the company, *passes a piece of memo* we're giving you something like an angpou in good spirit of the festive season.
Cool.Thanks mate. I mean Thanks Sir.
No problem. Btw, tuck in your shirt
Stare in silence
Someshirt aren't nice when tucked in.
Tuck in your shirt
Yes sir.

I need to treat someone. I called Kumar for a drink later. I'm paying!

Priorities

Recently, my application to work as a process engineer with an italian company in Lumut, Perak has escalated to the next stage. The interview went well, everything was all i could have hoped for. Everything, especially its the biodiesel industry. In the matter in fact, its going to be the first plant in malaysia that will be doing mass production for the country to fuel our cars.

The timing was exactly as i have predicted. I knew biotechnology, petroluem engineering would head this direction. Of course, i have read about the nation's goal to work this direction about 5 years ago.

As dandy fancy it may sound for a chemical engineer graduate, i have much to decide. In fact, i can't decide. How should i decide? I don't know what i want. I don't know what God wants. This had to happen nearing the end of January where my current company is about to decide whether to confirm me or to ~you know~ fry me up.

Change
Change is good
Change is frikken scary.

__________________________________________

So on a usual morning, as i was preparing breakfast, i thought these are one of the type of issues that its best i seek advice from my dad.Aafter my dad did his daily run on the treadmill, i looked at him.
He stares at me
What?
Pa, you're aware of the biodiesel job offer?
Ya, have you decided?
I shoke my head
I wanted to ask you, what would you do?
Then he spoke on priorities in life. We have to have priorities, with them decisions would be less difficult to make. Everything will fall into place.
What do you think my priorities should be?
You tell me
God~~
God's everywhere
Thats the problem.
Seriously, i need help - what would you do if you were in my shoes?
I can't give you an easy way out, its your call to make decisions. To learn from ur decisions.
I stare in silence
When i was at your age, our circumstances were very different. Know ur priorities
Geez dad, thanks

I've decided mine. Have you?

The Mess Sorting Mess

The past weeks has been the most interesting days i've ever had. Incidentally, it was also most messy. I don't mean physical mess although i can't deny that my room is an absolute mess. Every night when my brother and I goes to sleep, all our little trinkets comes to life and have its routine battle leaving a random arrangement all over again.

Well, yeah.
It's been messy.
My heart's in a mess.
My mind's in a mess.
My stomach is confused.
I haven't figure whats the problem and surely, i cant figure a solution.

I cramp and push all these pile of mess to a spot back in my head in order to be able to work, cook, eat; basically to carry on living.

Often, i love weekends. Weekend is when i lay back and chill, go out and drink coffee, bury my mind in novels, go out to do some shopping.

Because there was a mess..
Because there was a state of confusion...
I know i need to fix it,
I decided i need to clean...

_______________________________________

I needed a sense of accomplishment, and well-living. I woke up and begin with some chatting and then to sorting. As i was sorting my massive wardrobe mess, I felt that as i do so, concurrently i was also trying sorting my life.

Life. as in my future.
what do i want?
-in my career
-in my relationship

At completion, the air was fresher, smooth fresh lavender replaces that fragrantless dusty environment. In a way, sorting out these physical mess around me became my escape route out of the mess in my mind and heart. Unfortunately, i still couldn't sort my life. Issues too complex. Or is it that i made it complex? It just IS complex.

This complication that i cannot understand and solve is just driving me to the brink of insanity.

As i just finished washing both cars at home, i felt like i have achieved something. I have created a brighter possibility for the future. I have also created the possibility for the car to get dirtied again.

Then i understand, i can't keep a close watch over this heart of mine anymore. I need to let live take control of it. Even if it has the possibility to get 'dirtied' again.